How Do You Sign; 'My Mommy Is A Sarcastic Bitch'?

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Eating supper with Bea and Owen last night.

Bea:  "I need a knife Mom."

Me:  "We're eating macaroni and cheese, what do you need a knife for?"

Bea:  "I'm going to cut Owen up into little pieces."

Me:  "And then what are you going to do with him."

Bea:  "I'm gonna put him in the fridge and save him for later."

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Owen,

You already sleep with the lights on.

Might I suggest you leave your hearing aids in all night?

I would not trust that evil Muppet freak across the hall.

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After Owen makes huge mess on kitchen counter with juice which he knows he's not supposed to pour himself, 'cause he sucks at it.

Me, cleaning up sticky juice mess: "Thanks a lot Owen."

Owen:  "Don't say Thank You!  It's not right!"

Me:    "It's called sarcasm kid, get used to it."

Owen:  "Huh?"

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Thanks Sis  for sending me this.

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I'm glad everyone enjoyed the Boob Story.

The Blow Job story is *ahem* coming later this month.

No.  It is not a tutorial.

Yes.  I had requests for one.

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We're not allowed to talk when the TV is on.  The TV barely gets loud enough for Owen to hear it, so when he's watching, nobody makes a peep without being reprimanded;

"No talkin! Can't hear TV!!!"

Al finally fixed the TV so it is loud enough for Owen.

Now that the volume satisfies Owen's Deaf ears, nobody can talk when it is on.

Because it is SO DAMN LOUD.

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Kim at allconsuming posted this on her blog.  It made me so happy, I had to share.

If it doesn't make you happy too, you just may be a jerk.




Please don't tell me if you don't like it.  I don't want to think you're a jerk.

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More random at UnMom