Monday, September 5, 2011

All Summer In A Day

Awake to what sounds like the children playing Hunger GamesPlace silent bet with Universe, putting money on Bea.

Throw breakfast at kids, instructing Owen to hurry it up as camp bus will be arriving shortly.

Owen informs me that he won't be attending camp.

Flip the Universe the bird.

Quit blog.

Pack up towels, suits, swimmy vests, sunblock, snacks and drinks.

Throw kids in car and head to Auntie's pool.

Remind everyone every 13 seconds that while swimming? Owen Can't Hear You.

Buy new car:

Head home via grocery store. Remind children every 13 seconds to;

Stop fighting, pay attention, stop fighting!,don't touch that, stop. fighting. please.,NO you can't buy a DVD, stop it with the fighting already!,NO I'm not buying candy, are you ever going to stop fucking fighting?

Put groceries away. Throw lunch at kids. Do laundry. Clean bathrooms. Vacuum entire house.

Pack for New Hampshire!

Story Land:

Santa's Village: Where Deaf kids get in half price!


Indoor water park where I smash my heel at bottom of stupid slide which gives me a bruised bone and a sexy limp for the rest of the fucking summer day.

Relax in hot tub after long vacation day with margarita and light rain falling on face.

Sit in traffic forever on way home. With tired and cranky kids. And tired and cranky Al. And tired and cranky me.

Pick up favorite cousin Ned for sleepover.

Pack suits, towels, swimmy vests, sunblock, snacks, drinks, shovels and buckets and drag kids to pond.

Remind Ned and Bea every 13 seconds that while at pond? Guess what!

Owen. Can't. Fucking. Hear. You.

Go to work where I lose most beloved sweet old lady, and am sad.

Also lose least beloved, not sweet at all old hag lady. Not much with the sadness.

Come home. Clean house, do laundry.

Pack suits and towels and take kids to swim lesson.

Exhaust self with attempt at interpreting for Owen. Totally suck at it.

Home again.

Al tends to grill while I ensure children don't set each other on fire.

Chicken wings. Burgers. Corn.


Wrangle kids into bath, jammies, bed.

Clean house. Do laundry.

Service Al.

Cuddle up with laptop and watch every episode of Torchwood.

Fall asleep with glasses on face and Kindle on chest.

Dream of short buses and preschool classes.


  1. Damn good summer. I can't believe I wasn't there at all and missed all the fun.

    Happy Shortbus Day tomorrow.


  2. I am calling it a comeback, with tears in my eyes.


  3. Please say you're coming back. I'll bribe you with wine. Happy back to normal day.

    Also? The Fucking fighting? My God, it never stops.

  4. "Stop fighting, pay attention, stop fighting!,don't touch that, stop. fighting. please.,NO you can't buy a DVD, stop it with the fighting already!,NO I'm not buying candy, are you ever going to stop fucking fighting?"

    This sums up my summer in a nutshell.

    God bless the big bus and the short bus.

    I've missed you.

  5. I'm exhausted just reading that. Damn! But I'm sure there was some fun among the fighting.

    Welcome back.

  6. Best.



    :) Sounds like a blast, and I'm so happy Owen stayed home for it all!

  7. OMG, can I come spend next summer with you? I'm a mean laundry folding machine.

    ALSO OMG, your kids are getting so BIG!

    AND, I'm a little jealous of all the fun.

    Oh yeah, I missed you girl!

  8. I feel the need to repeat every 13 seconds how happy I am to see you back here.

    But time doesn't translate well in comments.

    So you just have to trust me.

    I'm happy.
    I'm happy.
    I'm happy.

  9. I'm taking this as a sign.

    And I hear you with the fucking fighting. Oh good, god. The fucking fighting.

  10. What everyone else said. As for me, I saw there was a new post here and my heart just smiled ;-)

    You've been missed.

  11. Tell me about it...

    You know, if you leave clean laundry in a heap for long enough, it doesn't smell clean anymore.


  12. Sounds like a fantastic, frustrating, great, exhausting summer! :)

  13. Happy summer. Always happier with wine right?

  14. 'sup stranger.

    Missed ya bunches.

  15. Sounds like you put your focus where it needed to be for a summer...hoping that (wore you the fuck out enough) rejuvenated you to bring your life back to those of us who love your view of it.

    Even if you only come back every so often, we will take what we can get and probably ask for more but who cares?

    Welcome back! I hope.

  16. I am exhausted.

    I have missed you.

    Thank God you're back

  17. Busy, busy, busy. At least Al got a little blowie. Everyone hates a grumpy daddy.

  18. So glad you're back! Found out about your blog, read all the archives...and you stopped for so long! Been checking everyday. So nice to see a new post!

  19. I wouldn't say you stopped blogging, I'd consider it a long breathy pause, one that Mariah Carey should consider.

  20. Welcome back! We've missed you.

  21. Excellent.

    Love the wine in the fire shot.

    Welcome back ; -)

  22. You have been missed, Momma.

    I'm still not sure if you were recapping your summer or a storm that blew through.

  23. oh i love that youre so real here. thanks for taking us through your life in short bursts of words and pictures. Its a familiar overwhelm, complete with the occasional f bomb :)

  24. I'm going to pretend that all I read was "pool, pond, wine, kindle". Because the fucking fighting? I get enough of that at my house. Except I add "Don't hit your brother, dingus" at my house.

  25. well hello there! super fantastic update, woman.

  26. I have missed you and your fabulous wit. I hope this means I will see more updates from you. :)


  28. dude! what a summer!

    i have slacked on the blog thang too. who cares. it is more fun to do it when you WANT to than making it a daily grind kind of thing. right? RIGHT.

  29. Summer is tricky all around.

    But a new car is a nice thing to throw in there. Pass one my way?

    Why do your kids look so much bigger than the last time I looked at them? Seems like children just telescope during the summer months.

    Don't quit blogging. Really.

  30. i can't count the number of times i smiled while reading this.

    and not cuz i suck at math.

    jughugs, k

  31. You're back! Whoop! Whoop!
    "Don't call it a comeback/I been here for years/Rockin' my peers and puttin suckas in fear"
    (Name that tune!)

  32. ah, glad to have you back. i hate to tell ya, but that fighting thing? yeah, it doesn't end. my kids are 11 and 14, and i still say stop fighting daily. i hope youre limp is better. other than that it sounds like an amazing, memory-filled summer!

  33. Only thing better than seeing you back at the blogging? If I had my own wine glass the size of a fourth grader. Glad to have you back. Nice 'hawk, Owen.


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