Friday, March 25, 2011

Gender Bending and My Current Girl Crush

So.  I've actually become friendly with Turnip Farmer.  I have to stop calling her that, cause I do like her.  She'll from now on be known as Jane.  She's nice.  Her daughter and Bea love each other.

There is another Mommy at Bea's preschool who I'd taken notice of, but didn't talk to for months.  Not because I thought she was a jerk like Poor Me - who has proved her jerkitude several times, but that is for another post - but because she is so fucking pretty.

Like Victoria's Secret lingerie model pretty.  At least as tall as my 5'9", with long straight dark hair, big round navy blue eyes, Snow White skin sans a trace of make-up, and great clothes. Not fancy great.  But casual great.  Shit that I would wear.  And hats.  Cool hats.  I look like a dork in a hat.  Ok fine.  I look like a dork when not wearing a hat.

Pretty chicks can't be nice too right?

So.  I never sought her out for chitchat as the kids pranced around the Outdoor Exploration Area.

Then Bea started talking about her son, Miles.  I'd noticed Miles.  Just as gorgeous as his Mama.  And sweet.  Bea telling me after school that she'd played house with Miles;

"He likes to be the Daddy.  But sometimes he is the Mommy and I am the Daddy.  And he likes to hold the baby, and change its clothes.  He is a good Mommy."

I had to tell Hot Mama.  That her son is the only boy that Bea talks about.  That I've spied on them, and seen how well they play together.

Of course I was nervous.  As if this Hot Chick was going to reject my frumpy mommy ass.  But no.  She was so much cooler than I'd ever expected someone of that level of hotness to be.  Genuinely friendly.  Easy going and real.

The next week?  She sought me out to tell me that Miles talks about Bea too.

And today?  After we'd helped relieve the kids of their jackets and germs from their hands, they ran off together toward the 'Housekeeping Area'.  I praised her son for how well he plays with Bea.  She told me that playing house is his favorite thing.  He does it at home too.  Plays with dolls, takes care of them like they're real babies.  And;

"God bless him right?  He's going to grow up to be such a kind and sensitive man.  My husband doesn't love it, but I'm not about to tell my son he can't play with dolls. I'm going to nurture that side of him whether his father likes it or not."

And thus my girl crush was confirmed.

I wanna hang out with her.  All the time.

And her beautiful son.

I bet Miles and Owen would get along just fine.

He'll share his fuzzy pink gloves.

And there are plenty of Princess dresses to go around.

We just won't tell the Daddies.


  1. that is so cute- I'm so glad that you're making new friends-
    I love the photos of O and B playing dress up.
    Have a great weekend-

  2. Al's so gonna kill you for those photos... xo

  3. The next person who goes at me for revealing too much about my kid on my blog and providing fodder for possible future humiliations will be sent directly here.

  4. I'm a wee big jealous you're making IRL friends. I need to get myself out there and do the same.

  5. Those pictures are awesome!

    When my oldest boy was younger, he would use to use towels to make "dresses", and turned gift bags into "purses". Today, these photos make FABULOUS blackmail pieces. What 10-yr-old wants you flashing around something like that? Hehehe! :)

  6. Do the Daddys read your blog? Cuz that could be a problem ;)

    My older son is always bending the gender rules- I had to buy a doll for one of my classes to practice reflexes on- I went to put it into the goodwill pile when I finished and my 8 y/o son rescued the baby and now takes care of her on a daily basis- I love it ;)

  7. So happy to hear your girl crush is working out. And your kids look ridiculously adorable in those princess dresses!!!

  8. Soooo... if a girl is too attractive you don't want to be friends with them? And what does that say about us may I ask :) ?
    I love those photos!

  9. Hahaha...attractive people are people too and I'm glad you realized that.

    Also, my son had two older sisters and always insisted I paint his nails when I did theirs. He loved it and my husband didn't.

    Flash forward to today and he no longer pains his nails and is so NICE to girls. Of course, that could be because his sisters are bitches but whatever....dress up rules!!

  10. that last pic is priceless for you know, the teen years. so nice to make friends with mamas that are cool and your kids like each other.

  11. Both of my younger brothers played with my sisters' and my Barbie dolls (including the gigantic Barbie makeup heads) as children. Nope, Dad didn't like it one bit. My one brother even got all into home ec type stuff and sewed and cooked - as a middle and high schooler, mind you - and Dad didn't like *that* one bit either.

    Now, each of them are wonderful, amazing fathers and my home ec-adoring brother went to school to be a chef (he isn't a chef by trade, though he does do the lion's share of the cooking, much to my sister-in-law's delight).

    Also? My only child - a girl - loves Star Wars *so much* (despite being chastised by the boys in her class for liking something that is a "boy thing") that she plans to be Luke or Anakin - not Leia - for Halloween next year. Which I'll totally let her do. (Heck, one of the girls in her class was Harry Potter this past year. Not Hermione. Harry.)

    In conclusion, gender stereotyping creative play is bullshit.

  12. She really does sound awesome! What a shame that society starts trying to enforce gender restrictions at such a young age. Kids should be allowed to play with whatever toys or games they see fit! I grew up playing with boys' action figures (much to my mother's dismay) and I turned out fine. So there! I hope you both rock on with this play arrangement and that everybody gets to enjoy their friends and games of choice :)

  13. As much as I love the fact that the hot momma was also friendly and cool, I love that fact that other people nurture that side of their sons! Awesomeness.

  14. I have been known to throw on a cute little princess dress and a wonderfully sparkly tiarra and I am all man, baby, all man. So I say, let the boys be boys. In a pair of precious pumps.

  15. I have been known to throw on a cute little princess dress and a wonderfully sparkly tiarra and I am all man, baby, all man. So I say, let the boys be boys. In a pair of precious pumps.

  16. I love this! I am always intimidated by the pretty moms as well. I can also be somewhat of an introvert when it comes to meeting new people. I am a dork like that.

    I am so happy that you are nurturing your son's gender bending ways as well. Why not?! I think that it is great for boys to be allowed to play with girls toys and vice versa. I know that most men do not agree (mine included) but whatevs. We rule the world anyways!

    And the best part about those pictures...great blackmail when they get older!

  17. This is so great! Thanks for filling me in on the pretty moms, they are usually a different breed.

    My boy is in a dress with a baby constantly...its just how it should be.

  18. My boys were around 2 or 3 when they came running out of my bedroom wearing my bras and saying "Look mommy! We're WOMENS!" Nice.

  19. why is it that pretty people intimidate us normal people? but i'm glad she turned out to be nice, and cool and have an awesome kid. i'm all for the transgender playing. my son dressed up in his sister's princess outfits and even now, at 11 if he finds a pair of high heels lying around he'll try to walk in them even though he's all boy.

  20. Well crap. I'm loathe to admit it but I HATE when girls are pretty AND nice. It's like the two can't exist and when they do my head explodes. Add the fact she's got a super cool kid...lets just say I can't find my nose, its exploded of my face...

  21. Your posts are awesome.

    You say the stuff so many people avoid many mommy blogs are blah blah my perfect kid.

    My oldest son liked to wear his sister's hair bows around the house when he was around 2-4 years old.

    I could care less. My daughter played football.

    Ben who is 11 lets his dad's girlfriend's daughters paint his toenails.

    Live and let live.

    I used to avoid the earth mother, hippie type moms because I thought they would judge my diet coke drinking, girly girl self...


    that is all

  22. I have found your long lost cherry! ROFL!
    You have an award on my blog!

    Have a great weekend!

  23. Well, it looks like someone has a new girl friend. :)

  24. Somewhere in the 20 odd boxes of photos I have a picture of Son in the Disney Cinderella gown. Having just won a round of Pretty Pretty Princess.

    I think I have a girl crush just from your description ; -)

  25. Good she be a bigger ham! Fucking sweetness!

  26. Hey those are my fuzzy pink gloves!

  27. So THAT'S why no one talks to me in this stinkin' town.

    And I thought they were all just bitches...

    Love you, Tulpen.

  28. Nice. Being drop-dead gorgeous can be a burden, you know. It's time people spoke up.

    (My kid also rocks the princess dresses from time to time. Though I'm not sure I'd call him "nurturing".)

  29. Fuck gender roles and the horse they rode in on. Yea for Bea, Owen, Jane and Miles for keepin' it real.

  30. I need to e-mail you some pics from the boys playdate this week. W. was "Princess Beauty". As you know, he loves his baby dolls. He is getting a new one for his bday next week and his dad doesn't give a rip. glad you are connecting with new peeps!

  31. I'm with DarcC 100%. I love kid rebels...

  32. Those pictures are simply too much - my imaginary friends, growing up, were all girls. I think I turned out mostly ok :-)

  33. Screw gender roles is right, my girls have a friend next door and he loves to wear princess garb. And they play with his train set. Who cares?

    I am almost crying at this because here I was thinking I was the only one afraid to approach pretty mommies. Shit. I need to learn from you, Tulpen!

    Love all the photos. Especially the pink gloves!


  34. I love that woman's attitude. All sorts of awesome.

    Even if she's pretty.

  35. Empress totally said what I was going to say, sexy bitch.

    Glad that you and your kiddos have nice people to play with.


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