Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Hey Finch, Is That A Harry Potter Wand In Your Pocket Or Are You Just Happy To Sell Me A Phone?
We've been having fires in our little fire pit in the yard.
Al got some really long sticks and pointed up their ends for s'mores. Owen sucked at toasting marshmallows. Setting the things on fire was way more fun.
Then he realized that just lighting the stick on fire is fun.
He enjoyed some closely monitored pyromania for the afternoon, yelling "Harry Potter!!!" as he waved his smoking stick at the bushes.
"Careful careful careful!!"
No screaming burnt children. Yay us.
The next morning, Owen showed me a boo boo on his arm.
A really good burn is what it was. It must have hurt like a fucker.
This kid, who is usually a total pussy about the slightest bump or bruise, endured what must have been a pretty painful injury in silence, lest he lose his fire sword privileges.
Oh yeah, we'll let him play in the fire again.
No really, we will.
So I got Owen's quarterly progress report yesterday.
His teacher had nothing but good things to say about him;
He definately likes reading more than math.
He definately is getting the hang of using an interpreter.
His teacher definately needs to hit spell check before sending me another report.
If the kid weren't Deaf, I'd definitely consider fucking homeschooling him.
This is one of my favorite Owen pictures. Taken four summers ago.
Al HATES it. He won't look at it.
I think I had to tell him that I destroyed it forever.
Grounds for divorce perhaps?
Dearest Best Buy Mobile Phone Guy,
You people are just the best you know that?
Like a few months ago, when I brought in a digital photo frame I'd gotten for Christmas but never even took out of the box. Even though it was WAY PAST the 30 day exchange period, and even though I had no receipt, you let me swap it out for a much needed external hard drive.
And today, you greet me and my broken purple phone and promise to do whatever you can for me. Oh, if you only knew what went through my mind as I took in your scruffy face and inhaled your salt water and bubble gum scent; it had nothing to do with my phone sweetie.
But help me you did. Even though Al failed to get me the protection plan and my phone wasn't eligible for upgrade yet. You went ahead and let me steal Al's upgrade.
How nice of you! And you even gave me this awesome new toy;
For FREE. Ok, maybe our cell phone bill will be a wee bit higher from now on. I pay the bill. Al never needs to know.
Doesn't matter if he gets pissed anyway, he's divorcing me over the gender bending pics of his son I've posted.
So, cute mobile phone guy, can I call you Finch?
You like Jason Mraz?
More Random and hopefully more wrongness at UnMom