So, I read a couple blog posts, got a sorta icky comment here, poured some wine over it all and decided to answer a hypothetical question.
It all started with Starrlife's post which led me to this post which reminded me how much I liked this thing that Katy posted.
Did you bother to click the links? Nah. I wouldn't have either.
Fine. The hypothetical question?
If I could cure Owen's differences, would I? If a magic pill or procedure could restore his hearing tomorrow would I high tail it to Children's Hospital and demand he be the first to be cured. Would I?
And I would also refuse the magic time machine that could take me back in time and allow me to give birth to a healthy Owen instead of the CDH baby I got.
The second I say yes to the time machine;
There goes my life. My home. Bea. All gone.
Owen born normal leaves me in Vermont. It deprives me of this life that I happen to love. It cancels out the Owen that I happen to love. It makes Bea not happen at all.
And the not Deaf Owen is not someone I know. Not someone that HE knows.
I'm fairly confident, that it would seriously fuck Owen up to suddenly leave his Deaf world and be forced into the Hearing world.
Being a Deaf kid is all he knows. His Deaf friends. His stellar school.
Yes, he likes being able to hear with his aids. He digs music. He rocks at the whole talking thing.
But he also knows he can turn it off. He likes the quiet. He loves his Sign Language.
He is a child of both worlds and I can't imagine taking that away from him. I would never consider it.
I got a comment on that last post where I bragged about Owen getting a good grade in his mainstream music class that said;
"Must make you proud to have your child in three mainstream classes."
Well, that just crawled up my ass sideways.
I don't give a shit about how my kid does in a mainstream class. I thought it was funny that the DEAF kid scored his best grade in MUSIC. For all I know, that teacher gives the Deaf kids a free pass.
I don't fucking care.
I don't fucking care if he ever takes another mainstream class.
I DO fucking care that he is a happy kid, a happy DEAF kid.
Which he is. Most of the time.
And he does make me proud. Most of the time.
Even when he is telling me off. Which he is able to do in TWO languages, at the same time. While not wearing any pants.